Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Dumping Ground

I don't know if it's my upbringing, the role I was pushed into from having an abusive father and a narcissistic mother, or if it's just my personality, but for some reason, I'm The Listener everywhere I go. People dump on me all the time, and I don't mind it, but it feels like I don't have a voice. In fact, I really don't think that I can articulate most of the time how I feel. Take right now for instance: I'm having a real battle with depression right now. But I can't really tell you how I feel because I'm not used to doing it.

It's hard, losing your voice. It's sort of like losing your identity. You have these friends who just go on and on and ON about their job, their family, their weekend plans, etc., but they never ask about yours. And I've tried it. I went for an entire day with my friends once, never interjecting anything about myself, but they never noticed. And it's not that they're this way. I seem to bring out the selfishness in other people.

I guess what I'm saying is don't be afraid to ask your friends questions, and be really careful about what you're saying. Let other people talk. Communicate information that is relevant. You never know when the person you're talking to might be feeling really horrible about themselves, and just needs someone to care.

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