It must be difficult to be married. My best friend, A, got married in May, and I was her bridesmaid. We've known each other for years and years, and we've been through a lot together. It was an honor to stand up with her, and I can't imagine a better person to have so much happiness. But I still feel like I got shuffled off to the side after she said "I Do." And I know I'm totally selfish for even feeling left out, but I feel left out, and there's nothing I can do about it because that's what I feel, and feelings aren't wrong!
Anyway, I know that she is suddenly a step-mother, a wife, and she has a huge family already, so it's only natural that I'm shuffled off to the side. I see her every Sunday at church. With her husband. And her step-daughter. And it's great, really. I love her, and I love them. But I've lost my best friend. She found a new best friend, and she married him. That's the evolution of life.
My other best friend, C, has been in my life since I was a teenager. We've known each other for fifteen years now, and she's great, but she's not a soul-friend like A is. A and I are sisters from another mister, as the saying goes. We look alike, we think alike. Heck, at her rehearsal dinner, her father-in-law came and gave me a huge hug, and I was all awkward because clearly I should have met this man at some point, and while I'm horrible with names, I'm usually really good with faces, but I couldn't place his, and then he called me A, and I was like, "Yeah...I'm the College Girl. Sorry! But thanks for the hug!" and we laughed.
Anyway, school will be starting up soon and I won't have time to wallow in self-pity. Plus, A said something on Sunday that made me think she's realizing we never freaking see each other any more.
So, the new school year is about to start. I have my backpack, my new notebook, both purple, and a set of owl pencils that my mom got for me. I need to buy my book for College Algebra, 10th edition. It's on Amazon for pretty cheap, or at least cheap compare to all the other books, and I'll probably need some test answer sheets and stuff, but my professor will let me know.
I can feel the school year in the air. It's exciting.
Monday, August 1, 2011
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